Missionary Decision
Sunday found me sitting across from my Bishop, discussing my options. Actually, not even my options. I had already made the decision. We were discussing what my next step was. But, before I get into that, a little background might be helpful.
Back in the summer of 2012 I was discussing the possibility of serving a mission. It was a vague thought in the back of my head, but it just didn't seem right. And maybe part of it was just that I was too scared to go. My excuse was that I didn't have the money and didn't want to burden my parents when they could barely afford to take care of my four younger siblings.
In October 2012, a couple weeks before my 21st birthday, I went down to Utah over Conference weekend to visit my sister. Her friend offered us tickets to General Conference and since she'd never been we gladly took them. The tickets were for the Saturday morning session so we woke up early and walked a mile or two to the Conference Center. This session ended up being the session where President Monson announced the Missionary Age Change. To this day, I still remember my thoughts and feelings at this announcement. For one, I was turning 21 in less than two weeks and then they change the age to 19 for women. I remember texting my mom and saying: "How do you feel knowing that you now have two daughters old enough to serve missions, when a few minutes ago you had 0?" She of course was surprised like everyone.
With this age change, I knew that I wanted to serve a mission still, but school was more important to me and as I mentioned, I was scared to just pack up and go. So, I held off but it was still at the back of my head and would occasionally come to the front of my mind but I would eventually dismiss it to go back where it resided.
Fast forward to Spring semester 2015. Several friends have been on missions and returned. Three of my roommates are RM's. I am graduating in December 2015 with my Bachelor's. I recently became single again. Perfect time, right? I thought about it a lot and talked with a lot of friends. They were all really supportive of it, and finally my roommate's fiance said: "Just do it." That was it, I was going to do it. So, I texted the ward clerk and set up a day and time to meet with my bishop.
When I told him I wanted to start my papers he asked me to bear my testimony right off the bat. I bore my testimony, testifying that I know that this is the true church, that Joseph Smith saw God and Jesus Christ and organized their church, that Jesus died for us so that we could return to God again, that God loves each one of us and is always there for us. When I finished bearing my testimony, he asked me questions like how I get along with people I don't like and how I would deal with companions I don't get along with, and if I'd be happy going anywhere even if I got called to Pocatello. I answered that I would pray to God for love and compassion, and that I would be happy no matter what, even if I got called to Pocatello.
That was it. He was ready to recommend me. We spent the rest of the week getting in contact with my family's bishop in Las Vegas so that I could get into the system, and as of yesterday I officially started my mission papers!
I am so happy with my decision, I love the Gospel and serving the Lord. I can't wait to bring the Gospel to so many more people! I have set my availability date to January 2016 and I am so excited to be graduating and then serving the Lord! This is the start of many more great decisions and a life full of service to the lord and joy.
Soon-to-be "Sister Enos" or (hopefully) "Hermana Enos"
UPDATE: On looking back at this post, I wondered if maybe I should delete it or maybe write an update post about my mission decision. However, upon talking to a friend I have decided to instead just write an addendum at the end. When I wrote this blog post, and started my papers going on a mission seemed like the right thing to do. I felt good about it. However, a few weeks later some things changed, and my feelings did as well. I prayed on various occasions on weekly (and sometimes more than that) trips to the temple. It was while I was discussing the possibility of maybe putting off my last semester of college to serve and discussing it with various friends and family that I started to get a bad feeling about it. My prayers had not been helpful, they merely showed me a possible future of me not going rather than what would happen if I did go. About a month ago, I came to the difficult decision that (at least at this point in time) serving a mission is not right for me, and I have been focusing instead on graduating and writing and editing. I have no idea what is going to happen or what I am going to do. In fact, at this point in time January seems like a giant empty black space. However, I have complete confidence that God will lead me where I need to be in order to fulfill my callings in life.
I would hope that as others read about my decision and work to make their own decisions they will remember to pray to God for inspiration and accept whatever he says as they make their own decisions. It really is for the best, although we may not understand it at the time.
<3Claire
Back in the summer of 2012 I was discussing the possibility of serving a mission. It was a vague thought in the back of my head, but it just didn't seem right. And maybe part of it was just that I was too scared to go. My excuse was that I didn't have the money and didn't want to burden my parents when they could barely afford to take care of my four younger siblings.
In October 2012, a couple weeks before my 21st birthday, I went down to Utah over Conference weekend to visit my sister. Her friend offered us tickets to General Conference and since she'd never been we gladly took them. The tickets were for the Saturday morning session so we woke up early and walked a mile or two to the Conference Center. This session ended up being the session where President Monson announced the Missionary Age Change. To this day, I still remember my thoughts and feelings at this announcement. For one, I was turning 21 in less than two weeks and then they change the age to 19 for women. I remember texting my mom and saying: "How do you feel knowing that you now have two daughters old enough to serve missions, when a few minutes ago you had 0?" She of course was surprised like everyone.
With this age change, I knew that I wanted to serve a mission still, but school was more important to me and as I mentioned, I was scared to just pack up and go. So, I held off but it was still at the back of my head and would occasionally come to the front of my mind but I would eventually dismiss it to go back where it resided.
Fast forward to Spring semester 2015. Several friends have been on missions and returned. Three of my roommates are RM's. I am graduating in December 2015 with my Bachelor's. I recently became single again. Perfect time, right? I thought about it a lot and talked with a lot of friends. They were all really supportive of it, and finally my roommate's fiance said: "Just do it." That was it, I was going to do it. So, I texted the ward clerk and set up a day and time to meet with my bishop.
When I told him I wanted to start my papers he asked me to bear my testimony right off the bat. I bore my testimony, testifying that I know that this is the true church, that Joseph Smith saw God and Jesus Christ and organized their church, that Jesus died for us so that we could return to God again, that God loves each one of us and is always there for us. When I finished bearing my testimony, he asked me questions like how I get along with people I don't like and how I would deal with companions I don't get along with, and if I'd be happy going anywhere even if I got called to Pocatello. I answered that I would pray to God for love and compassion, and that I would be happy no matter what, even if I got called to Pocatello.
That was it. He was ready to recommend me. We spent the rest of the week getting in contact with my family's bishop in Las Vegas so that I could get into the system, and as of yesterday I officially started my mission papers!
I am so happy with my decision, I love the Gospel and serving the Lord. I can't wait to bring the Gospel to so many more people! I have set my availability date to January 2016 and I am so excited to be graduating and then serving the Lord! This is the start of many more great decisions and a life full of service to the lord and joy.
Soon-to-be "Sister Enos" or (hopefully) "Hermana Enos"
UPDATE: On looking back at this post, I wondered if maybe I should delete it or maybe write an update post about my mission decision. However, upon talking to a friend I have decided to instead just write an addendum at the end. When I wrote this blog post, and started my papers going on a mission seemed like the right thing to do. I felt good about it. However, a few weeks later some things changed, and my feelings did as well. I prayed on various occasions on weekly (and sometimes more than that) trips to the temple. It was while I was discussing the possibility of maybe putting off my last semester of college to serve and discussing it with various friends and family that I started to get a bad feeling about it. My prayers had not been helpful, they merely showed me a possible future of me not going rather than what would happen if I did go. About a month ago, I came to the difficult decision that (at least at this point in time) serving a mission is not right for me, and I have been focusing instead on graduating and writing and editing. I have no idea what is going to happen or what I am going to do. In fact, at this point in time January seems like a giant empty black space. However, I have complete confidence that God will lead me where I need to be in order to fulfill my callings in life.
I would hope that as others read about my decision and work to make their own decisions they will remember to pray to God for inspiration and accept whatever he says as they make their own decisions. It really is for the best, although we may not understand it at the time.
<3Claire
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